mangoes: pain-in-the-ass tasty treat

my apologies to my filipino brothers and sisters, but mangos have got to be the most annoying fruit on the face of the earth.

First, you need two utensils to eat the fucker. You'll need a) a knife and a spoon -if you're filipino or b) a knife and a fork if you're one of three americans who actually likes to eat mangos.

And lets not forget the odd shape of the fruit and its giant pit that make extracting the edible part of a mango more tedious than removing spyware from windows xp home edition.

And that's not to mention the stringy fiber that is all up in your teeth for two days after eating one.

Mangoes are a fruit where you'll probably be washing your hands immediately after eating one, otherwise walk around for the rest of the day with sticky hands a-la-kindergarden playground days.

And every time I've ever eaten a mango, I'm wearing a white t-shirt. Once that mango juice gets on your shirt? Forget about it. Might as well make it a tie-dye and send it to Bill Walton.

And finding a mango that's ripe? Good luck with that. Either its bitter and not ripe or you open it up and its a whole 'nother science project up in there. SOMETIMES they're just right; do consider playing the lottery on those days.

Mangos may taste good, but they're the most high maintenance, pain in the ass fruit ever.